demisexual-dryad

Latest Posts by demisexual-dryad

My ninth grade bio teacher handing us a packet to complete and not elaborating but putting far too much emphasis on the fact that penises produce cum twice.

I was extremely uncomfortable. I wish I could’ve just walked out. Her saying that once would’ve been enough. She did not need to describe it and specify multiple times. Almost obsessively so. Filling out my packet on consent and STDs and types of birthcontrol appropriate for each scenario (as if there was a correct answer for any of that on god that shit was graded) wasn’t enough really, but it would’ve been fine if I no longer had to listen to her, a married woman, talk about her experience with penis in a room full of 14 year old boys with the maturity of toddlers. Especially as a recovering victim of rape and sexual assault that never got addressed, having to read scenarios about consent not being respected in those packets already made me very uneasy. Her going on a dick tangent? Yeah no. I was 100% not comfortable.

Childhood

⚽️

And food! They eat each other too. :)

My body is already an inhospitable environment, there’s no way a friggin baby would be able to survive in it

I got zarude. Ain’t no way. I’m not fighting anything remotely like an ape fuck that they’re menaces

spin this wheel of all the pokemon. you now have to fight this pokemon. just you and it, bare-knuckle

Get that yaoi my man

(These are the more common ones i can name off the top of my head, just curious)

I’m pretty sure the quartering act makes this illegal, no? Same shit British soldiers did to us I believe. Entered your home without consent and just took whatever they felt like. In search of rebellion weapons and whatnot.

What has this country come to.

I was an athlete and I fucking hated it.

Something that’s not widely spoken on is how dysmorphic you can feel in your own body when you’ve been doing sports from a young age. I felt like I looked masculine. I felt I had too much muscle tone. I didn’t feel like a woman at all, much less myself. For better context, I was a competitive swimmer for four almost five years straight. Starting in fourth grade, ending around the beginning of highschool. My body had no softness or curves. I was stick thin in some areas and bulking in others (think inverted dorito with a flat tummy and like a-cups because I couldn’t manage to keep on enough fat for tits att). I was always hungry. And I’ve never been physically competitive in my life. Practices that I once enjoyed (because they were for children and had fun games like sharks and minnows) and eventually tired of went from one hour almost immediately after school, to an hour and a half and two hours on weekends, and then to two hours everyday for the entire week. Recall: I didn’t choose this sport. My step sister did. I wanted to try other things, was told “no this will help you get into college you’re good at this.” I was not good at that, I was OK at it. The other part of that: I would likely have to swim in college if it did help me, and I wanted to GTFO not swim for a college team. I fought with my mom a lot as a result. I was already in a bad spot mentally. There were many practices where I just got so upset I would swim and cry because I didn’t fucking want to be there, and I would backtalk my coaches if they pissed me off, and then my mom would get mad at me for making the coaches mad and making her look bad. Fun fact about swimming in Florida! THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS AN OFF SEASON!

That’s right. I was swimming in pools and attending practice year round, no fucking breaks to be a kid. Everyday. Middle of the afternoon. Yippee. I had no friends at practice, some kids would claw at anything they could grab and yank you backwards. FUN! Everyone was always so about it and very competitive. (Recall: I am not a physically competitive person unless we’re talking hide and seek or cops and robbers back when I was like 7 and I couldn’t go home till the streetlight came on). Everyone judged me for my lack of enthusiasm. I didn’t really care because I genuinely didn’t want to be there. My mother made me attend every meet. I almost got hypothermia at one meet, my coach had to force my mother to take me home because my muscles locked up and I had to start forcing myself to shiver. (For context; yes this was in Florida, it was a December morning that was devoid of sun, strong winds, grey sky no sunlight all day, slightly rainy, 40° F ambient temperature, outdoor pool with a shitty pool heater, and opposing teams had used all the hot water left in the showers. All my gear was soaked through and wouldn’t dry— remember no sun, it was cold and rainy— so I just stayed wet in-between events. Events that were very delayed and had hours of gap time between them. This is not even including windchill. I had been there since seven in the morning. My mom just told me to do laps before my events to warm up- my body was no longer producing heat I’m pretty sure, because I would jump on my toes, and I was so terribly cold in my damp parka that the cement felt like it was bending under my feet. I didn’t leave until just after twelve I think). There were meets like once or twice a month and unless I made plans and begged (recall: no friends on the team, very few irl) I was going regardless of whether I wanted to attend or not.

I had five panic attacks while at that pool :) each on separate occasions due to stress from homework and all the other shit I had waiting for me at home.

I was once sexual harassed by a group of girls who thought it was funny and chased for a short while by them while walking to my practice once. Didn’t tell my mom or the school, they wouldn’t have believed me or done anything anyways so I didn’t see a point.

Towards the end of my swimming career I was skipping practices whenever I could get away with it. I really hated it by then. My mom actually once told me people were judging me for my excoriation disorder from my step sisters team, and that I should just stop picking my skin, because it was making my step sister look bad because our parents were dating and I have ocd from trauma. :)

Anyways. Yeah. I wore glasses, had braces and exertion induced asthma, so I literally do not like most sports. I usually ended up with a ball hitting me in the face because some jock kicked it without looking while I walked the track. I now work around a pool and that was the best thing to ever come from my swimming career, and I mean that with complete sincerity.

Feel free to talk about your experiences in tags/replies/ect, and reblog if you'd like. I've been quite curious about this lately

Shout out to the USA for pissing Canadians off so bad it flipped an entire election that was supposed to be a landslide for the center-right, forever in your debt o7

Slept like a child who insisted they stay up past their bedtime at a party and not even five minutes later is found in a dead sleep on the couch.

Why do we say “slept like a baby” when babies literally wake up screaming every two hours?

I want to sleep like a middle-aged dad who “rests his eyes” during a Marvel movie and wakes up refreshed, confused, and ready to barbecue.

One day this is going to be applied to like, a meteor about to collide with the sun or something, and people will somehow make an act of doomsday into a love poem about a doomed romance wherein both parties inevitably collide and their lives literally crumble as a result of their union. A union of death and utter destruction and one that is inevitable in that its temptation is too great to bear.

Humans can romanticize anything. And not like the fear of nature romanticism. We just want everything to kiss, I think.

well have you considered that maybe the unstoppable force is in love with the immovable object

Have pie

reblog to give this to your mutual

uUUUUHHHHHHH LISTEN I GOT MUSCLES BUT NOT ENOUGH MUSCLE TO DUAL WIELD BLADES AND TAKE DOWN MONSTERS MANY TIMES MY OWN SIZE. YEAH I’M A LITTLE FUCKED.

Isn’t it like physically impossible to dual blade in real life unless you’re using light swords/daggers/axes? Unless there’s like mega magical protein In my food I’m cooked. The gravios is gonna see me and fuck my shit uppppppp…

Not to mention my old soft tissue injuries- I sprained my ankles real bad and it still aches- it’s been almost two years. My shit still clicks when I roll it in a circle. My shoulder too. Dislocated that in January. That clicks too now.

I could probably handle desert heat though. Florida is a mix of desert and swamp, so at least the exposure won’t do me in.

Yeah

NOTICE: As more and more fanfic writers are using generative AI for their works (you uncreative dweebs), I hereby swear on everything I hold dear that I have not and will NEVER use generative AI in ANY of my written work. Everything I post will be organically and creatively my own.

Imagine you’re out here hosting an orgy and then suddenly this little creature comes along and bites your dicks off and walks away covered in the remnants of your flesh.

Like bro. It’s beautiful, but that is essentially what’s happening here

Fucking burry me there goddamnit

Kuju Flower Park, Japan

astrailor_jp

We gonna help one of my fav fandom artists or what?

Ok people... so I went to turn my tablet on and... it doesn't.

So I would be very grateful if you shared this post... unfortunately I'm tight on money since most of it has been going to meds, since what I've been diagnosed is so bad I can't function at all otherwise.

Ko-fi

Support periwinkla

Support periwinkla

Sometimes I feel bad about my body.

And then I remember I’m basically a giant wandering ecosystem, in which all things contributing to my existence have done so just so that they could survive, and then I basically feel like I established world peace on a cellular level because now everything in my body has to work together harmoniously to survive or nothing survives. There just isn’t room for war in this house. :)

And then I’m like. “Damn. I’m like a little mini biome for bacteria and single celled organisms and cells. A walking terrarium. Fuck yeah. That’s cool.”

“You’re a sick fuck!”

Yes I am… please… tend to me like you would an ill child… I am dying…

Here’s a thought.

What if ao3 did that thing where you could put white text in. Yknow. To fuck with scrapers? I know that isn’t much but mannnn would it be funny to write some absolute gibberish in the margins and literally poison their data instead of making fics inaccessible to people who want to view them privately as guests, or who can’t make an account.

You wanna steal the way I write? Ok. Here’s some absolute hogwash to for you to enjoy! Or maybe we just start posting pictures of the fic content on the archive from whatever writing platform you use. Maybe fuck with art-generating ai while we’re at it.

Imagine. You ask for it to generate a picture of text on a page and it spits out an image of an open book with the most filthy nonsensical BDSM fic’s text written on the pages.

Or we could write absolute nonsense fics out of spite to fuck up their data even more. How’d you’d like that, you data-hoarding cretins? Wanna steal my fic data? You’ll have to pick out which ones are worth it. And there are millions :).

Edit:

Also, bold of these fuckers to assume that a machine can think up anything insaner than a human can. And to somehow do it better. Like, bitch please. Humans have been writing stories and porn and fanfic for like, ever. It’s literally our thing. You’re gonna have to keep pace with us, rust bucket.

This is it. This is their dynamic. We’ve figured it out. Pack it up everybody, we’ve found it at last!

The whole Phoenix poker coding vs. Edgeworth chess coding thing gets me every time.

Like the contrast between the two games, how they way they’re played perfectly reflects each of their styles of law please god I need more ships that do this it’s so hyper specific tho

It came in bouts.

Terrible things happened when I was around five. My father had been abusing my mother in front of me. Verbally, physically, emotionally, financially, you name it he did it. That’s right around the time your memories start by the way. That was probably the first time I actually wanted to die. I didn’t understand it, but I’d play dead in my bedroom, hoping that if I laid there hard enough it would just… happen. Thought that I wouldn’t be missed. Who was gonna pay attention to a corpse when there was a screaming match outside your door, right? My parents divorced soon after, but my father still wasn’t done with causing damage, so he sabotaged my mother’s credit score. It’s hard to be happy kid when your mother is crawling into your bed at night as a child, not in fear of her own life, but later learning she was in fear for yours. And then when you finally see her no longer in fear for your lives you then see her bone tired and pushing herself to the limit to make rent and feed two growing kids, and get a college degree your father kept her from getting, all while working three jobs? Shit was rough. Ate a lot of tv dinners to get by for a while. Sometimes the toilet paper was more appetizing and cheaper at the time, so I would sometimes eat that like a little creature because it made the hunger stop for a little while.

When I was six I was sexually abused by a family member she trusted to watch us while at work.

I was abused again around that same age by my father’s girlfriend’s son, who was a large bit older than me, though it wasn’t as direct.

My dad would physically and verbally abuse me when I was over at his house for the weekends. He’d let his girlfriends do it too if, because they would try to be my “new mommy” and it wouldn’t work because their vibes were horrendous and they always assumed it was because they were taking away my dad’s attention from me, when he didn’t even give it to me in the first place if it wasn’t in his interests or to save face. Sometimes there were no snacks because he would always date almond moms who couldn’t stand us ‘free-grazing’. So sometimes I just went hungry, even when I was in a sport.

Things didn’t start getting better till I was around eight or nine. And not by much. I got diagnosed with ADHD, but my mental health issues got so much worse around puberty. I didn’t know how to make friends because I was so reclused into myself by that point. I kind of just did my own thing. Nobody really seemed to want to keep me around anyways, and I really tried.

Things were okay for awhile when I was ten and eleven.

When I was twelve my mental shit came to a head. I found a group of friends, but I had to annoy them in order to stick around. I was determined then. They ended up ditching me when I was way older anyways so that blew. I got braces. Started therapy. There were a lot of tears and old wounds reopened. At one point I was homeless and couch surfing because my dad refused to forfeit visitation rights even though he was evicted from his condo. That was a trip. Sometimes I would have to have a sleep over with a friend just to get a shower because he wouldn’t pay utilities. Sometimes when he was single there was nothing in the house to eat, and we would be stuck with nothing until he came home from work. Sometimes he would kick us out and lock us out of the house in the middle of the day during the Florida summers to make us “get off our lazy asses.”

Things didn’t start looking up really for my emotional state till I was about 14.

Then I turned 16 and one of my family members died. Was in a car accident while driving my first vehicle (wasn’t at fault. But damn. It was scary). After that things were better, but to be honest? They’re still kinda shit.

I’m 21 now.

So your answer?

Worst years of my life:

5yrs old - 9 yrs old

12 yrs old - 14 yrs old

16yrs old - 18yrs old

…and now I’m doing better. Not completely OK. Not even good really. but better than I can really remember being in a long ass while.

Nowadays I’m just stressed with school and work all the time. Not really super happy or fulfilled yet either, but I’m assuming that’s pretty normal for my generation.

How old were you at the lowest point in your life? Reblog this and put it in the tags, plus your current age maybe. I'm trying to see something.

Y’know what? Fuck you.

*deoxidizes your ribose*

Me now wym

Me if I were a dog.

*Sports announcer voice* ANNNNNNND HEEEEE’SSSSS SAFE!

Poor guy. At least he might’ve survived! He probably did to be honest, snakes are more resilient than you’d expect.

People are so stupid about snakes. If there's a little black racer chilling outside just leave it alone, you don't have to kill it, it's probably dealing with all your pests for you, jesus christ

Ugghhhhhgghhgghfhfhfhfjf ITS so FJUCKINNG PRETTYYYYY

blue jacaranda blossom in 昆明kunming, yunnan province of china

Okay and how is he planning on policing what is essentially nicknames???? Bitch I just won’t respond. You can’t make me. Call me by my preferred name or it’s not mine.

People be mad over the most inconsequential shit. Go fix the global warming crisis or the homelessness you useless wet paper towel of a human.

Oh wait, sorry, I apologize. That’s insulting to weak wet paper towels. At least those can be recycled.

Botany: You don’t know where that’s been, but it might be yummy. Go for it- worst case scenario you die discovering a new poison.

Astronomy I-

I did. But I also technically didn’t.

I may or may not have slept through a minor (very feelable though mind you, because my brother woke up and the walls were rattling about) Earthquake. It woke everyone else we were staying with up (we were out of our home state). My dumb ass slept through it like a baby. I wasn’t even on a proper mattress. I was on an air mattress, on the floor. I should’ve felt it.

Felt nothing of the sort.

I’ve also slept through some of the most major hurricanes in the past two decades though, so I mean do with that what you will. I also went out to take photos of wildflowers when a tornado danced just outside of my family’s house, and watched it from my bedroom window while I was still in an open field a short walk from our house recording and identifying a plant species for fun and I didn’t even hear it. :/ I’m just built different I guess.

One of these days my obliviousness will kill me I think.

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