illusoryxdays

Latest Posts by illusoryxdays

Google cloud madness. Basically had to redo all the configuration for nginx, keepalived and ssl, but it's done! And working I think?

Also, my sister brought me a pretzel 🥨🥲 that's love man

current study motivation… (pt. 2)

[🎥🎞️🥨💌]

Almost done with this semester (classes at least). It's hard to be negative when the days have been so warm and sunny and when there's a book fair coming up.

2023.09.25 // 17:00 literature review time! i get to learn so many details about a rare little sparrow

pic: new york public library schwarzman building, manhattan, n.y.

saturday | may 24

treating myself to a productive morning at a bougie coffeeshop. most weekends i just study in my dorm until the library opens, but getting off campus is a welcome disruption. just a couple more weeks left in the term, something which is both reassuring and terrifying.

in other news, my petition to graduate early was approved yesterday, so i'm officially 1 year away from finishing my degree!

05-24-2025 // 2:30pm

Woke up at 7am as usual and went to the library at around 9am, stayed until 1:30 pm and then came back home to have lunch. I actually did some good progress on the coding assignment so I’m very happy but I’m still at 1/3 of the total so i gotta keep grinding! Going bouldering this afternoon so I hope it’s gonna be fun.

5.24- Saturday

Took a small break from school for the past three days and jumped back in this morning with some readings on argument credibility and fallacies. I’m really enjoying this critical thinking class. It’s a very nice break from discrete math.

Listening to: krisgaldr by heilung

Reading: financial feminist by Tori Dunlap

21/100 days of productivity!

Good day beautiful people! Hope u r having an amazing day filled with positive energy! Log: 24.4.25

Morning walk

Reading session

Proper lunch

4h Research session

afternoon cleaning

cook dinner - call home

Read before bed and yoga

Journal _MH check

I am safe in this moment, grounded and confident in my own skin. Good days are just around the corner, and even my darkest places are beginning to glow. Everything is unfolding as it should — I trust the journey, no matter what. With a heart full of gratitude, I welcome the miracles life is preparing for me.

20.05.25

last weeks of spring semester: energy drinks, coffee on top of that, two hours of sleep, doing a whole semester's worth of work in one night, two exams in one morning, sunny afternoons, chilly mornings and evenings, counting the days until the summer break

19.05.25 🍓 ☕ 📚 somehow this semester is not stressful enough to complain about but just stressful enough to feel tired all the time, so i let myself be peer-pressured into drinking coffee for the first time :') bitter af

May 8

Finals are over, so my first year of grad school is too! I'm still really anxious to hear back about my grades, but it'll be pretty easy to distract myself with all of the things I neglected to do when I was drowning in final assignments, studying, and anxiety (looking at you, giant pile of laundry).

"what did students do before chatgpt?" well one time i forgot i had a history essay due at my 10am class the morning of so over the course of my 30 minute bus ride to school i awkwardly used by backpack as a desk, sped wrote the essay, and got an A on it.

six months later i re-read the essay prior to the final exam, went 'ohhhh yeah i remember this', got a question on that topic, and aced it.

point being that actually doing the work is how you learn the material and internalize it. ChatGPT can give you a short cut but you won't build you the the muscles.

11 more days of the semester (5/2/2025)

Went to a lunch banquet for my research group :) it was kind of fun

Took another break day before finals week (also just me being straight up exhausted!! I don't know why I've been so tired lately)

| 18 may 2025 |

I'm at my aunt's by the shore :D trying to relax before I start research up, I've brought 2 library books and I'm halfway through the first one! I love taking sunset/sunrise photos so I may post a bunch of those..

25/05/15

Could not, for the life of me, get the lighting to cooperate in the library. I did, however, get a metric shit ton of work done.

Your boundaries, schedules, discipline, habits and routines = your life’s outcome. They are everything!

being a stem major with high love for humanities feels like being in a business marriage with a rich high class wife and having a constant affair with a dark academia mistress

~Update~

Last night, I had another crashout and realized I'm not at all prepared to test for my discrete math course. my foundation in math is not up to college level and it really shows. i'm going to divert and work on other courses and do tutoring for the rest of the term until i'm ready to take the final for discrete math again (and actually pass).

the relief i felt getting off the call with my advisor was insane. i'm starting on a critical thinking and reason course today so stay tuned for more complaining about that. i feel like a whole human again this is great.

Thursday, the 15th of May 2025

After I came home from rowing, I couldn't move a muscle. We hadn't the time for a break out on the water and had foolishly chosen a more difficult to handle boat while also not having someone to steer it. It was exhausting to do both. I kept turning around since it was busy out on the canals and I had to steer us with the sculls myself. Nevertheless, I adore being out with the boat. The sky and sun are bright, the wind refreshing and on the shores sit happy people: reading, playing with their dogs, having a barbecue or a drink. I too treated myself but to a pizza and quiet night with a book. Despite that, I carried the exhaustion into the new day and find it difficult to focus on my Czech essays. Somehow I have the ludicrous expectation to make it perfect, all-encompassing, when a good reflection is simply dependent on a specific question and a well-conceived argument.

14.05.2025 // catching up with readings

love all the reading I've been doing lately. it is also exciting to see my library build up over the years, especially now that I can afford to buy some of the books I have wanted for years. recommendations from friends and acquaintances have also helped me expand my reading choices beyond my usual categories and genres. the tbr list keeps growing and it's a reason to live for.

daiy routine reveal

42/100

Log: 15 May

Research Report Tasks

Chp 1 & 2: Fix citations (in-text + references).

Chp 2: Edit diagrams (labels, clarity, formatting)

DD_30 Challenge – Day 12

22.4.25

Coffee this morning - reading ‘On writing well’ by William Zinsser.

Watched a webinar on GI pathologies and pulmonary fibrosis.

Did some data/SQL review.

whoever invented beds was a fucking genius im just all cozied up in here like u don't even know how cozy i am

07/05 - Had to take a new route to my class, got lost, discovered at least three new murals and somehow ended up wandering hopelessly in the very pretty campus of a university I do not attend. Oops. Honestly, factor in the bubble tea, and not a bad way to spend an afternoon.

Next exam: History - 09/05

Revised social and political impact of WW1

French grammar practice

History past paper questions

⏱️: approx 5hrs

🎧: laissez-moi danser - pomme

Autistic brain really is like, "you have to overexplain so there is absolutely zero chance for misinterpretation"