How Matthew Would Go To Jail

Hihi! since you're doing an event i figured I'd send in a request for a fic idea thats been brewing im my mind forever. levi (from obey me) with an isekai reader, specifically the reader is a datable from an otome game similar to obey me that only levi knows about. how will he react to meeting one of his biggest fictional crushes? and then to find out hes their fictional crush too?? (sorry if it doesn't make sense)

Isekai AU - Levi

His brothers did not get the appeal of otome games. But for Levi, they were amazing. In the games, he was smooth. He used the in-game lines and had characters falling for him left and right. More people loved him in-game than loved Asmo IRL! Especially in his favourite game, Heed Me! But his favourite in-game character was you. You, unlike all the other dateable characters, weren’t a total normie. You invited his character to watch shows and play games and made references to non-copyrighted spoofs of stuff that he always understood. He was in love. And best of all, you liked him back. Urgh, and when you got jealous of the other dateables for spending time with him? It was weirdly attractive seeing you indulge in his sin. But, in typical otaku fashion, you were just his 2D crush.

You also loved otome games. Specifically Obey Me. It was just so fun, seeing demon brothers and literal princes of Hell fall for you to the point you were practically running a shadow government. But your favourite was the nerd who’d blush whenever you went near him. He may call you a ‘normie’ more than he called you by your name, but he was still adorable. You wouldn’t even mind sleeping in a bathtub with him! Even though you did not understand how his back survived that every night. It was probably the Ruri-chan body pillow. Sadly, however, the game was only that. A game. You couldn’t win the heart of a blue-haired otaku outside of the pre-written lines that made him swoon.

Until, of course, you woke up one day in a council room with some random redhead telling you you were in the Devildom. And after a lot of expletives, and a serious mental breakdown when you wondered if you were going insane, you’d almost gotten into the swing of things. Except for the fact that it was surprisingly difficult to talk to your now concerningly 3D crush. Why was he avoiding you so badly, dang it? The script says he’s meant to fall for you. He didn’t even challenge you to the TSL quiz. Which was especially hurtful considering you’d binged the series since arriving here and were now fandom-fluent in it. Though, to be fair, it was probably for the best that you hadn’t talked to him too much yet. There’s no easy way to approach a man you’ve read fan-fiction about.

Of course, little did you know that Levi was having the exact same issue. What in Diavolo’s name were you doing here? And, more importantly, why were you 3D?! He could barely even look at you without turning bright pink and running in the opposite direction, much to the amusement of his brothers. But what was really worrying was that you seemed to be making an active effort to try and talk to him. After a very long time spent gathering his courage, he decided to approach you. Maybe you just looked like the character from his game, after all. Maybe the only reason you’d been seeking him out is because you wanted to borrow one of his DVDs. Yeah, that was probably it. There was no way you were a self aware otome character come to life to mock him for being in love with a fictional character. Hopefully. He really hoped being isekai’d into his world wouldn’t allow you access to his browser history. He did not want you reading the fan fictions he’d read and/or written.

“Hi, MC!” He said, waving you into his room. Oh no. He knew.

“Hey, Levi. It’s nice to meet you.” Diavolo this was awkward. “Oh, is that Henry?” You had always wanted to meet Henry.

“How did you know his name?” Asked Levi, paling. He’d mentioned having a pet in the game, able to type in the name of his pet. You couldn’t really be that MC? But there was no other explanation! There’s no way his idiot brothers would waste time with you talking about HIM. You were panicking.

“You mentioned it before.”

“Nice try! I don’t talk to people.” He spluttered. “You’re from Heed Me!”

“Whaddya mean? What’s Heed Me!? You’re from Obey Me!”

“Wait... you don’t know what Heed Me is? It’s a - uh - a video game. An otome game.”

“What?! I’m not from an otome game, YOU’RE from an otome game!” What?! He wasn’t -

It took a solid hour of explanations, halfway through which you happened to spot one of his posters of you that he’d forgotten to hide. Man, the 2D you was hot. Apparently Levi had a crush on your character, who was a streamer in an otome game called Heed Me about a demon summoned to Hollywood who lives with a group of celebrities in various industries. It was nice to know that in at least one universe you were famous.

“One final question. How popular is my character?”

An- I hope you liked this. I got a bit carried away with the buildup lol. Reminder that requests are open (I also have an event on) and comments are appreciated 💛

I don’t want him to act ‘younger’. I want him to be an idiot!

Consider this for a moment...

My family (parents and sister) and I came to a very interesting conversation…

According to Anime News Network, “…a single anime episode costs about US$100,000-300,000 per episode, according to various producers we’ve talked to… But multiplied across 13 episodes, that nonetheless turns into a total budget of US$2-4 million.”

I will be transparent and forward and say that I need 10,000 sales (+1,000-2,000 for safety) to pay off ALL of my college debt and loans from my parents. 

Once that is out of the picture, the sales I make from SM2 will go towards me saving up for my house, taking over my individual bills, and building budgets for my next set of games for 2017 (all three of which are needed to start my company)

If SM2 becomes MEGA popular and sells really well, letting me have a good foot towards my future… I TECHNICALLY would need… 13,000-35,000 sales after the above topics are in good shape to make a pilot for a Seduce Me anime episode…

I mean… SM1 has 150,00+ hits… so… I mean…

Seduce Me the Anime could happen…

Maybe…

Possibly.

Does Sam not like Fucker because it sounds like him eating pussy?

The brothers and the Human Realm

a/n: so ik ‘jealous much’ won the poll but it’s still not done yet so have this instead!

context: a part of me still finds lessons 40-43 funny because the brothers have never really been to the human world that much, and they don’t really know how certain things work. Take the slow cooker and ice cream truck for example. So these are little headcanons I have for when all of y’all are together in the beginning of their stay in the human realm.

enjoy <3 , also these are in no specific order

you all are hopeless…

Solomon and MC would so fuck with the brothers while being in the human realm.

For example they’d take Lucifer to the shadiest mexican restaurant possible then after they finished eating they would tell the waiters it was Lucifer’s birthday and watch the Avatar of Pride sit there with a big ass sombrero on his head as they sang happy birthday to him.

MC later took a picture and sent it to Diavolo who then made it his lock screen.

Satan and Belphie tried to electrocute Lucifer by throwing a toaster in the bathroom while he was in the middle of a shower. This happened after the fact you told them not to put water on the toaster because it could electrocute someone. 

Beel ate an entire bottle of ibuprofen liquid gels because he thought they were hard gummies.

Beel also ate the food and cake shaped wax candle melts you had bought for Asmo as a gift

Beel lastly ate your whole brand new container of melatonin and it knocked him out for 15 hours straight. Needless to say Lucifer was very concerned for his wellbeing, and Belphie soon questioned if you had anymore.

Belphie and his brothers were never taught stranger danger, because who in their right mind would be a danger to them in the Devildom?

So after you had explained to him what an ice cream truck was he vowed to go to one with you.

However when a creepy old man in a white van offers him candy he believes it to be the same as the ice cream truck so he gets in the van.

When the brothers relay this information to you, you begin to lose your shit explaining how that was not in fact an ice cream truck he got into but instead a kidnapper van.

The brothers don’t know how to eat certain human world foods.

Such as a banana, watermelon, mango, pineapple, kiwi, avocado, cherry, dragon fruit, papaya, onion, etc.

So when you first buy one from the grocery store and leave it out before cutting it they automatically think it’s some weird shaped human food and bite into it eating the skin or seeds and all.

After they tell you about the weird but delicious taste of it you ask if they cut it or spit out the seeds before eating it, and when they reply with a puzzled look and a no your heart drops.

Thank god they’re demons. You then proceed to buy the same thing again this time cutting it up in front of them so they know what parts to eat of certain things.

Expanding on the cherry part, did y’all’s parents ever tell you not to swallow watermelon or cherry seeds because if you did a cherry tree or whole watermelon would then grow in your stomach??

I know mine and some of my friends parents would tell us that when I was younger to make sure we didn’t swallow any seeds.

If they didn’t then oh well, anyway…

Continuing with Solomon being an ass, he would so tell something like that to the brothers. If he happened to see Beel swallow a cherry whole he would then proceeded to tell Lucifer not to let him do that.

And when the oldest asks why Solomon would then go onto explain that if he swallows cherry pit then a cherry tree will then grow inside his stomach.

Of course this freaked out Lucifer so for the next hour he tried getting Beel to spit out all the cherries he ate.

You would have to organize their fridge and pantry in the new house because they don’t know which human world foods need to be refrigerated or not.

After you arrive at the house you spent a good three hours explaining to them not everything can go in the pantry because some of it will spoil after you open it.

Then you proceed to gag when you pulled out an expired chunky milk container from the pantry.

They find the concept of drive thru or fast food places astonishing. The fact that you can just order wait in a line for a few minutes in your car then get your food is crazy. They do however all panic though when you get to the front and they don’t know what to order off the menu.

Car washes are also something they found themselves favoring. You would turn up the music as you slowly pulled in and joked by telling the brothers you were going on a ride of sorts.

Which in turn shocked you when they did believed you as the car wash stared. Each of them were staring out the windows with starry eyes as different colors of soap were thrown on your car.

You laughed to yourself as they all admired the way the soap blended together, Asmo and Mammon found themselves taking pictures of the whole thing. While Belphie was telling Beel how this looked like a starry sky.

And Levi went on to tell Satan how this reminded him of an anime scene. Lucifer also found himself sitting quietly in the passenger seat enjoying it too. (Lucifer is a certified passenger princess, fight me on that)

Each brother questioned you on how this was possible and you replied with smile. After the car wash was over and you drove through the dryers they all asked if you could do that again, to which you replied smiling “maybe some other time”.

Lucifer watered the fake succulents and plants you put around the house for two weeks straight until you said something.

They love watching true crime documentary’s to the point you’d have to physically pull them away from the tv.

It happened one afternoon while a few of them were relaxing in the living room and you were looking for a channel to watch.

Deciding there was nothing interesting on you put on an old true crime documentary and began watching it. As the brothers heard the story of the crime from the tv they each became immersed in it.

Telling you things such as “how could humans do that to each other?” or “wow humans are more brutal than we thought” or even adding in their own comments on how they could have made the crime worse.

It became a guessing game between all of them to figure out who killed who during each episode you watched.

Much to everyone dismayed Satan was the one who won every time.

Meanwhile while they were all immersed in the tv you noticed Lucifer standing behind you, arms crossed also watching tv. You told him to sit down and watch with all of you but he denied, claiming he wasn’t really interested in stuff like this anyway.

Yet he never moved from that same spot each episode.

Each of the brothers have made something explode in the microwave.

Lucifer stained it red when he went to reheat pasta, but he put it in for to long and it exploded. Mammon overfilled his ramen thus causing it to leak then explode.

Satan and Levi also happened to be reheating takeout at the same time, but both of the containers were styrofoam and exploded. Levi got annoyed and Satan threw the microwave at Lucifer.

Asmo put some skincare product in there because he found something online about a certain hack, and it exploded causing the microwave to smell like burnt strawberries.

Beel put too much food in the microwave causing it to all melt together then explode.

Belphie put a coffee in there to reheat and it exploded, but he was too lazy to clean it up so he just left it. Lucifer was then next to use the microwave and got coffee all over him.

You made all seven of them watch the entire twilight series as a joke but ironically they all actually enjoyed it.

Satan even went out and bought the books, and finished all of them in about 2 hours

Bonus

Solomon distracted Diavolo for 3 hours straight by making him watch 5 minute craft videos.

Diavolo then proceeded to break things to try these said crafts which caused Barbatos to have a meltdown.

Barbatos destroyed an entire sidewalk because he saw two rats run across it into the sewer.

yeah im “transitioning” *dissolves into tiny pieces as i click to the next slide*

Well, anyone can be killed with a wooden stake if you try hard enough

Proof I’m a vampire: very pale, burn easily in sunlight, don’t sleep very much, look the same as i did when i was little

Proof I’m not a vampire: i eat garlic bread, can’t be killed by a wooden stake

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Elon Musk lands on Mars and steps out of his spaceship

“It’s a small step for a man, but a giant leap for mankind,” says ground control officer and cuts off all communications.