Latest Posts by badweatherbartender - Page 4
youtube is pulling this bullshit again
praying for the firefox gods to save me once more...
shoutout to the woman from my high school martial arts class who liked to get me in joint locks and then joke about how I was easy to catch. you cannot comprehend how psychosexually formative that was for me
THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN
openin’ the door to the microwave one second early because you don’t need all the hootin’ and hollerin’
Demonstrating the rope dart (繩標; sheng2biao1)
[eng by me]
Ace Attorney has a reputation for "No, your client can't be declared innocent unless you prove SOMEONE ELSE DID THE CRIME. That's the rules." And I don't think that's entirely fair.
But sometimes, man. Some fucking times that reputation is spot on.
Most of its cases are carefully sculpted to preserve some sense of ambiguity as to your client's provable involvement. You can craft a scenario in court that says your client was unconscious in a back room, but you're not given the ability to prove that. AA cases operate on the backfoot, with the prosecution laying out a clear and concise case for "They did it" and the attorney struggling to unwind it.
Finding the killer usually serves simultaneously as the clincher that absolves your client. Instead of "Your client didn't do it BUT WE'LL CONVICT THEM ANYWAY if you can't find someone else who did," it becomes a more clear-cut argument of "My client couldn't have done it because this guy did it instead."
...
And then there's shit like
So we're agreed! The evidence has shown that the defendant was on the other side of a gigantic, impassible ravine from where the murder took place. Therefore, it would be physically impossible for them to even have been present for the murder, let alone the perpetrator of the crime.
So. We're done here, right?
Mmm... no. I'm invested in the plot now. I want to see where this is going.
This fucking justice system, I swear.
what if there was a show where every character was gay and you had the token straight guy character who acted really stereotypical and was into cars beers and women and everyone was like OH STRAIGHT LARRY YOU’RE SO FUNNY AND STRAIGHT
Hmm. Lotta adults buying the Wicked novel for their kids this Christmas. Hope they're ready to field a LOT of questions.
every time you make freezer food for dinner instead of buying takeout like you actually want you should earn two hundred dollars cash and a round of applause
draw your fave wrestler like this
i love y'all but everyone saying "okami 2" like my boy here suffered for nothing
yeah my isekai adventure was going pretty well until I accidentally called the cleric 'healslut' and now he won't stop asking what it means
Hating yourself is harming others. Like, almost always. Even if you don’t mean it to.
Loving yourself enough to take care of yourself and be kind to yourself is what makes you more capable of helping others and doing good.
You’re not going to shame and hate yourself into being a better friend, a better spouse, better parent, better person, better service to the world. That’s done through love and gentleness. I promise.
And I know it’s work! There is no switch to flip that takes you magically from self-hatred, self-denial, insecurity, and depression to self-love, self care, gentleness, and joy! It takes work and, for many people, seeking outside help! But it’s worth it worth it worth it, not just for you, but for everyone around you.
Whimsy is a survival skill stop training it out of your kids!!! How are they gonna make it when shit gets rough???
I think there's something to be said that saying the words "Deny, Defend, Depose, you're next" to an insurance sales rep can get you arrested for 'threats of mass homicide' or whatever with a threat of 15 years in prison
But when I was a manager in a fast food restaurant I've had customers throw food at me, demand for my personal phone number with an added threat of "Well I'll just have to FIND it", customers charging past the front counter to physically intimidate me and my coworkers, screaming and swearing, demands to know what time I get out of work, demands to know when my manager would be at work as a threat, people sitting in their car waiting for me to finish closing because they were angry at me, causing me to stay in the office watching the camera waiting for them to drive away...
But none of those incidents are arrest-able offenses, not one, any time I called the cops on any customer I would just hear excuses like " "there isn't anything illegal about calling a restaurant", that nothing physical happened and therefore there's nothing they could do, to call back and let them know if anything else happens
Idk, just think it's A TEENY TINY BIT ODD
Cop in the news goes "words have consequences" as if people don't berate and threaten fast food and retail workers every day
had to show you guys. he looks so unbelievably bad. for context he always gets shit crusted in his fur because he doesn’t maintain it so my mom decided to give him a haircut and wanted to even it out
if you're a human adult you physically need to eat actual vegetables, read real books, work, exercise, be outdoors, have sex, and have other real adult humans to talk to all on at LEAST a weekly basis or else you go will literally go completely insane and the problem is too many people choose to skip all those basic needs on purpose
A while ago, some people asked me to explain D&D and other RPGs… so of course I had to make it into an infographic!
This is by no means a comprehensive guide. The game can be as simple or complex as you want, but there ARE some pre-established basics you should know about - and those are best discovered on your own terms!
Some resources to help you get started:
Watch/listen:
★ Rusty Quill Gaming Podcast - a ttrpg game in the Pathfinder system. Beginner friendly! Learn how to play along with the players!
★ Critical Role - a D&D game played by voice actors - Incredibly famous! Highly praised! Both videos and podcasts available.
★ The Adventure Zone - a TTRPG podcast by the McElroy brothers
Read/learn the rules:
📚 D&D 5e Player’s Handbook - pdf
📚 Basic Introduction to Character Races - website
📚 Overview of Character Classes - website
How-to and Tutorials:
🎲 Rolling a character - YouTube video
🎲 How combat works - YouTube video
🎲 Being a good player - YouTube video
And last but not least…
How To Play D&D Online! - YouTube Video
***
Of course, there are tons of other resources - endless writeups, dozens of YouTube videos and blogposts, and entire subreddits dedicated to this information. The important thing is to take things one at a time. Or not - just dive right in! Most seasoned D&D players are thrilled when others want to join them on their adventures and will be happy to help a new player find their tabletop legs.
Playing a spell caster in DnD for the first time and damn y’all really put in a lot of work. I’m used to just hitting shit with my various big sticks and rocks.
Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything is a DnD expansion with canon gay art, singular they, and a whole section on consent and respect at the table which is like... absolutely choice.
Making a DnD character with no weaknesses is not nearly as fun as creating a DnD character with one or two insane, game-breaking strengths who is failcringe at literally everything else.
someone should pay me a lot of money so i can take a year off work and spend all my time baking and writing and working out
Old ladies in coffee shop: Wow, you are so studious. It is nice to see a young lady so serious about her studies. Good luck for finals week!
Me who has been building DnD encounters for four hours: …thnx
ok i just got this thought out of nowhere but blog divers (people who scroll through a blog and reblog things that were posted YEARS AGO) are actually a super important part of the tumblr ecosystem
With people going inactive and deactivating, a lot of classic tumblr posts and also missed gems get lost because those connections get broken. Even on my own blog I forget about posts I made until I see someone in my activity reblog one of them- which then inspires me to reblog it myself because it was a good post and I want my new followers to see
do not feel bad about diving through someone's blog and reblogging shit from years ago, it keeps dashboards alive
(and if anyone has a problem with that, they can just block you or they can delete the root post ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, two things that have absolutely no effect on the grand scheme of our lives)
Someone PLEASE tell the Witch-King of Angmar that this little hobbit genuinely thinks it’s anyone’s guess whether or not he’s literate. PLEASE.
