YOU CAN’T SPELL ‘BEST’ WITHOUT BTS

my uterus realizing we aren’t having a baby after building up a lining for three weeks:

Using “she goes home to a cactus” as a way of saying her boyfriend is a prick is the most clever analogy I’ve ever heard. Ed Sheeran is QUAKING in his boots

FRAN DRESCHER as Fran Fine

The Nanny – 3.13: An Offer She Can’t Refuse

“A few years ago, I was crying and whining at my mom and sister while I was really drunk. I asked my mom and sister… it wasn’t long after we’d moved. I asked them if they were happy. I got drunk and woke up my entire sleeping family, like some ahjussi. It had been my number one goal in life, you know, to make my mom and sister happy. They both woke up and told me they were happy. But I was so envious at the fact that they were able to reply that they were, indeed, happy. Because it wasn’t like that for me. I told them while sobbing: I want to be happy too. Then I felt like I’d done my mom and sister wrong. But from then on, I started contemplating about happiness. For about six months, I pondered specifically over what I would need to do to become happy. I think that time of transformation has come. I think I need to be happy, now. I must become happy. I am going to be happy.” 

Rest in Peace. You will be missed, our dear Jonghyun. Life may have been cruel now, but I hope you find another life where you’ll achieve your happiness. Sing on in heaven, and watch over the boys and shawols you left behind. We aren’t angry, we aren’t going to curse you, you won’t be remembered for how you died but for how you lived. You touched millions of hearts and graced a gift upon this world that can never be replaced. You’ll live on in our hearts and within the happiest memories we shared these last ten years. Go In peace, this is our final goodbye.Let’s meet again.

Some assholes have been putting nails in cheese and treats in dog parks in Chicago and Massachusetts. Also adding antifreeze to water bowls.

Please watch out for your dogs. And if you find out the address of someone doing this, give me the address and tell no one. I will disembowel them.

LOOK AT WHAT I DID