Astrid Hofferson-haddock - Blog Posts

Oh no— 😭😂🤣🤣

The Derry Girls/Dragons crossover we need

Hiccup: Thank you guys for being here during this trying time. It's just so sad to think that he's gone...

Snotlout: You thought he was a dick.

Hiccup: I did not!

Tuffnut: I definitely heard you call him a dick.

Ruffnut: So did I.

Heather: Not to interrupt, but everyone does see the dead body in the room, right?

Astrid: It's just Mildew, Heather.

Heather: It's Mildew's corpse. It's Mildew's dead corpse.

Fishlegs: What were you expecting? It's his wake. Haven't you ever seen a dead body before?

Heather: Of course not!

Snotlout: Thor, the Berserkers are weird.

Ruffnut: You can touch his face if you want.

Heather: I don't want - why would I want?!

Ruffnut: It's nice.

Heather: Stop it! Stop touching Mildew's dead corpse!

Astrid: Calm down Heather, we're all going be one some day.

Heather: Oh, thanks, Astrid! Yeah, that's helped!

Snotlout: It really makes you think, doesn't it? Death... makes you want to do everything... and try everything...

Fishlegs: What's going on, Snotlout?

Snotlout: Want to see something class? *pulls out a box of scones*

Astrid: Scones?

Snotlout: Aye.

Astrid: What's so class about scones?

Tuffnut: Scones are lovely.

Fishlegs: Aye, I like scones!

Snotlout: These aren't just any old scones. These are funny scones.

Ruffnut: They do look like a crack-up, to be fair.

Fishlegs: They're drug scones! He's put the drugs in the scones!

Snotlout: Too fucking right I have. I wanted to do brownies, but this was the only recipe my ma had. Besides, everyone knows drugs aren't illegal when you put them into food.

Hiccup: Is that right? I don't think that's right.

Mrs Ingerman: *entering* Any cups up here? *snatches the box of scones* I'll take those downstairs. *leaves*

Hiccup:

Astrid:

Tuffnut:

Fishlegs:

Ruffnut:

Heather:

Snotlout: WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED?!

Astrid’s importance in Hiccup’s life is often questioned, I've seen posts on how she has schemingly separated the inseparable HiccTooth and how toxic she is towards Hiccup among others. What people fail to realise that her squirm towards the idea of marriage did not arise from her jealousy towards Toothless, but Hiccup’s over reliance on him which resulted in her betrothed’s inability to measure his own worth and capabilities beyond the dragon. She had not been toxic to Hiccup ever since they entered into a relationship and has been his biggest support system ever since. She has been the first one to believe in him and ever since has been his right hand throughout. The compassionate lady who beneath her tough exterior is anything but is the one to hold onto Hiccup throughout the worst of phases in his life. The girl who trained from her childhood to be an incredible Dragon Slayer to bring back the lost glory of her clan went onto become one of the finest Dragon Riders in the history, beside her husband: to give the fearsome beasts a chance to prove themselves after being convinced by Hiccup. Astrid Hofferson Haddock is incredibly talented: acing anything she puts her mind to, be it dragon slaying or training and even drawing! She bloomed like a lotus in his love, and continued to spread the love but didn't lose her sight or practicality in love. She divided his schedule into manageable little stacks for him to analyse and review, fought alongside him to protect their island and the dragons. She had been nothing but a source of strength, hope and unbridled joy to her then betrothed, now husband. As a mother she is gentle yet firm, proud yet concerned, and just always available for her kids. Astrid is the love of Hiccup’s life, his wife and the mother of his children. The strong Valkyrie deserves nothing but respect for being a fabulous friend, a wonderful wife and a marvelous mother and an awe inspiringly skilled Shield Maiden, General and now the Chieftess of New Berk.