Emotional Distress - Blog Posts

TW ! Graphic descriptions of abuse, trauma and self hate

P 0 R N Ø G R ª P H ¥

One topic I hardly ever see anyone talking about is how harmful pornography really is. I remember when I was still innocent and naive, when my cousin invited me to go watch something with her.

It was strange, new, she never allowed me to touch or interact with anything that was hers. As a child who had been in an abusive home, I was always desperate for attention. I didn't show anything back then when I first saw it, but whenever I remember it I force myself to vomit that negative thing out.

Never, regardless of the situation, regardless of the reasons, should a child be exposed to p_rn0graphy. A classmate from my old school wanted to have s** with me in the bathroom when I was nine. A f_cking nine year old student wanted to have s** with a naïve, newly adapting person of their own age.

Giving a child a tablet just to keep them quiet is a sick and unhealthy way to lead them to their doom. Because yes, porn is accessible as fuck. And for a child that you isolate from the world and from yourself, nothing is out of reach for them to want to fit into a group.

I'm never trusting anyone, I'm never looking at my own eyes on the same way ever again. And it's your fault. It's your fault that I always look to the sides, that I always feel disgust when I look at myself. Because nowhere was I enough. Nowhere have I been as beautiful as the p****tes that old ped_philes like to show their p_nises to.

I hate you all.

Now do me a favor and buy me a mask to hide this freak you made me see as my face. It's the only thing I need. To forget...

To stop looking at YOUR action's consequences!

(...)

[April 14, 2025_ 9:20 pm]

Gratitude for reading this far!

FUCK THAT AP GOV EXAM I SHOULD SUE THE COLLEGE BOARD FOR EMOTIONAL DISTRESS.

Ever wore an item of clothing that was just too small for you? Like a small jacket or jeans that were just too tight? With every move you make, you can sense that tightness, that feeling of discomfort. And no one likes being uncomfortable. And in order to be comfortable again, we need to remove that small jacket and put on a more comfy one.🧥👖

Physical discomfort is one thing but emotional discomfort is some totally different. It's not like we can just remove that uncomfortable emotion and replace it with a more comfy emotion. Since we can't do that, most of us end numbing that emotion in order to get comfortable again. Sadly that doesn't remove the discomfort but rather just covers it up until it shows up again. And when it does come up again, we numb it with emotional eating, drinking, shopping and doomscrolling on the socials. 😮‍💨🍺

But the thing with emotions is that they need to be felt. At first it may be hard because feeling that emotion pain is just too uncomfortable. But the deeper you feel into it, the less uncomfortable it becomes. You might have to do it multiple times but eventually it subsides and sometimes even disappear.

So think of a child coming to you crying and telling you that they feel sad or upset about something. We don't tell the child to go shopping, to scroll on social media, to drink or smoke so that the pain goes away. We allow the child to cry, we give them a hug and we tell them it's gonna get better and they are going to be okay. 🌸🌸

So what normally helps me during those times of emotional discomfort is sitting with myself and acknowledging what I feel. Then I communicate with myself - telling myself that I feel sad, angry or in pain but I know it's temporary. I ask my body what's trying to tell me. Other times I go on a walk and just talk to the part of me that is in pain.

And the more I do that - the less uncomfortable that emotion becomes. 💨

It's about having that uncomfortable conversation with yourself. Sometimes we don't know why we feel the way we feel but we just have to feel the emotion. We owe it to our inner child to sit through that emotional discomfort with them and free ourselves. How do you normally deal with your emotional discomfort?