They're Lesbians Harold - Blog Posts

One thing that will never not be hilarious to me is my mom once telling me my dad hadn't met any gay people before meeting my mom and her gay brother and her gay friends.

What my mother meant to tell me was that my FATHER who has a group of UNMARRIED MALE FRIENDS OVER FIFTY, who has watched the ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW LIVE at least twice, who is into DnD, Star Trek and Tolkien, has NEVER, EVER met a gay person in his life before meeting you.

And the worst part? He probably believes that too!!!

My point is that you've met a lot of gay people, you just didn't know they were gay.

(Sakura sees Sarada upset one day.)

Sakura: Sarada, what's wrong?

Sarada: Chouchou and I had a stupid fight... Now, I don't even know if we're still friends...

Sakura: That's fine, you don't need female friends anyways. They're really dramatic! In fact, I broke off my friendship with my first ever friend, Ino, even though she was the only person who had ever been nice to me after years of bullying. She just wasn't worth it after I assumed that she had a crush on the boy that I liked, your father.

Sarada: 👀 Mom, what the fu-

Sakura: And later, when she saved me during the Forest of Death stage of our chuunin exams, deliberately lost our match in our preliminary fighting round, and told me that I had blossomed into a beautiful flower, I never thanked her or apologized to her because I have always known what was important to me - your father's love.

Sarada: 👀

Orochimaru, sipping tea in the Uchiha house because he apparently gets invited to everyone's houses for tea now despite being a canonical child torturer: 👀

Sarada: Mom, I'm going out tonight; I've got to go tell Chouchou that I LOVE her.

.... and they were classmates!!!! OH MY GOD, THEY WERE CLASSMATES!!!! 🙀🙀🙀🙀